Nina, I'm Sorry
by CassidyTVNut
Summary: Abs and Harry tell Nina of Ellen's death. I didn't think that it was particularly clear in the show how Nina was told, or if she was told at all given that she wasn't at the funeral. So this is my take on how Nina found out.


Nina, I'm Sorry…

**Abs and Harry tell Nina of Ellen's death. **

_I didn't think that it was particularly clear in the show how Nina was told, or if she was told at all given that she wasn't at the funeral. So this is my take on how Nina found out._

**This will probably be the first of a lot of Casualty fanfics from me. I've recently downloaded Series 21 so I have had a lot of inspiration for stories. There will be a lot of Harry/Ellen coming up, some Harry/Selena and a bit of inspiration from the ED team.**

'Someone's going to have to tell Nina,' said Abs quietly as the team sat in a bar close to the hospital, drinking to Ellen's memory. 'I know that she and Ellen had their differences, but the cancer really brought them closer together.'

'Someone should,' agreed Harry, draining the remainder of his beer. He knew that he shouldn't be drinking, and he hadn't touched a drink of that kind for so long, but he needed to forget, to escape from his grief.

'Are you going to tell her Harry?' asked Maggie, resting a hand on his forearm and squeezing softly.

'I don't think she'd appreciate hearing it from me,' admitted Harry. 'She never did like me all that much; I don't think she ever forgave me for doubting Ellen.'

'She forgave you,' said Abs. 'She appreciated you being there for Ellen when she couldn't be. She knew how much Ellen meant to you, and how much you meant to her. But I see what you mean. Do you want me to tell her?'

'I think that would be best,' replied Harry. 'Are you going to tell her over the phone?'

'It would be easier, but she'll be so devastated, naturally. I can't reassure her very well over the phone. I'll track her down,' he responded.

'Once you've found her, can I come?' asked Harry. 'I want to be there.'

'Sure,' said Abs, picking up his pint and taking a sip. 'I'll phone her now and find out where she is. She'll be suspicious though…'

Picking up his phone, he dialled Nina's number and pressed the phone to his ear, listening to it ring.

'Nina,' he said. 'It's Abs. I can't explain much now, but we need to talk. Are you in the area? London? Nina, we really need to talk. I'll get the train over tomorrow. I know I'm being vague Nina, but please understand. This won't be easy for you to hear. Whereabouts are you staying? Park Lane Mews Hotel? I'll find it. Meet me in the lobby at 12? I'll explain more tomorrow. Okay, bye.'

Hanging up the phone, he said, 'She's suspicious, but I was expecting that from her. She's staying at the Park Lane Mews Hotel in Mayfair, so we can get the train up there in the morning.'

'She won't be expecting me to be there,' said Harry. 'She'll know when she sees that I'm there that something's wrong.'

'She'll know soon enough,' replied Abs.

_Park Lane Mews Hotel Lobby, Noon_

Nina paced up and down the lobby before slumping into a nearby chair. What did Abs want? Why did he want to meet up with her? Did he want to get back with her? Had something happened.

And then her stomach sank. Could it be Ellen? Had her cancer returned? No, Ellen would have rang her and told her, wouldn't she?

Her thoughts were interrupted as her eyes glimpsed Harry in the doorway, followed by a pale looking Abs.

'Nina,' said Harry quietly, making her jump to her feet.

'It's Ellen, isn't it?' mumbled Nina quickly and incoherently.

'Yes,' said Abs quietly.

'Has the cancer come back?' asked Nina, tears filling her eyes. 'Has she been hospitalised again?'

'If only,' said Harry, tears filling his own eyes.

'Is there somewhere we can talk, somewhere quiet?' asked Abs.

'There's a garden around the corner,' said Nina softly. 'Follow me.'

She led them through the traffic into the garden, where they found themselves sitting on a small bench. So many unanswered questions filled Nina's mind, so many possible nightmares. In her heart of hearts, she knew what had happened.

'She's dead isn't she?' asked Nina.

Looking to the floor in unison, Harry and Abs said, 'Yes.'

'She can't be,' protested Nina. 'I didn't leave that long ago! She was in remission, the cancer, it couldn't have come back and got that bad in such a short time.'

Harry's eyes were still focused on the floor, but Abs looked up, and his eyes met Nina's, holding her gaze as if his eyes were giving away what his mouth couldn't say, the words he couldn't speak.

'It wasn't the cancer,' stated Nina, figuring it all out. 'What was it?'

'An accident, at the hospital,' said Harry, still not looking up. His hands moved up to his head and ran through his hair.

As if sensing that Harry couldn't continue, Abs said, 'Ellen was looking for a little girl who'd gone missing. She ended up outside, bursting through the doors. She didn't see the motorbike coming…'

'She was hit?' asked Nina, already knowing the answer.

'Yeah,' said Abs softly. 'Harry and the team did everything that they could to save her, but her head injury was just too severe.'

'Oh God,' said Nina, bringing her hands to her mouth and sobbing into them. 'Would she have felt any pain?'

'No,' said Harry, looking up and placing a reassuring hand on her shoulder. 'She was unconscious from the start, it would've been painless. I'm so sorry I couldn't save her Nina, I'm so sorry.'

'Don't beat yourself up about it Harry,' she said, her hand moving to his arm. 'Ellen trusted you with her life, if you couldn't have saved her, no one could have. You loved her, I know you wouldn't have let her go without a fight.'

Harry couldn't hold back the tears anymore. Pulling him into a close hug, Nina said, 'It's okay Harry, it's okay.'

'How can it be when she's not here?' asked Harry.

'Ellen wouldn't have wanted you to be like this, she would've wanted you to be happy, to move on,' said Nina.

Wiping the tears from his face, he said, 'You're right. Why am I the one falling apart? I should be helping you as you fall apart, not the other way round.'

'Don't worry about it Harry,' she said. 'Are you going to stay?'

'I have to be getting back,' he replied.

'Will you stay Abs?' asked Nina. 'I need you.'

'Of course I'll stay,' replied Abs.


End file.
